Without My Mom – Year 2

I’m taking a break from my regularly scheduled programming to remember my mom today. I can’t believe it’s been 2 years since she left us, it feels like just yesterday.

I don’t know why it’s so difficult for me to accept, I know they say that time heals but I disagree. I feel just as devastated today as the day she passed. I relive her last weeks in hospice, what it was like for my family, how many people came to see her. I relive her last day and the morning that it happened quite often, that image of her and everyone around me that is engrained in my mind forever. I relive the moments after she passed. I cried like I never have before, unabashedly, like no one was there.

I cried into every person’s arms that hugged me. As I write this, I’ll admit that tears still roll down my face. I just miss her so much. There are the days where I celebrate her and then there are the days I mourn. Today is a combination of the 2.

I was 7 in this picture – from then until I was 30 I believed my mom was invincible. She was my Super Woman. Yes, we didn’t agree on a lot of things but we also agreed on a lot of other things. As I grew older a lot of people told me that I remind them of my mom. I never saw it, until now. There are lots of people that miss my mom and when they see me they say I’m just like her. I take that as a compliment. 🙂

I miss you, Mommy! Here on Earth or up in Heaven you’re still my Super Woman. 

xoxo,

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