I had a meeting last week, nothing that I was scared of. I have meetings all the time, and I’m usually as cool as a cat (I don’t think cats are cool, but some of you do). I’ve presented to strangers and friends alike, and even though I grew up quite timid and shy in nature when it comes time to speaking about something I’m passionate about – I don’t feel too nervous. Just a few general insecurities…
- Will I stutter?
- Will they think I’m overly confident?
- Will they think I don’t know enough?
- Will they think I’m unprofessional?
Anyway, that meeting reminded me about how hard it is to be authentically me. It may be easy for others but it’s a definite challenge for me.
It’s not easy for me to put myself out there; to show my vulnerable side, to show people that I don’t know it all, to show people that I actually do know a thing or two, to show people who I really am…it’s just not that easy. Why? I don’t know. But a lot of times it’s easier to show people what they want to see, say what they want to hear, or do what they want me to do. And every.single.day. I fight to be the best I can be and to show the world what I’m really about; without any hesitations or inhibitions. Authentic, unique, and true.
Yup, that’s me. My latte-drinking, short-hair-sporting, Hawaii-sunbathing, art-admiring, cheap-clothes-wearing, loving-and-caring self. Take it or leave it, World! And thanks for constantly reminding me that it’s okay!