The First Mother’s Day Without Her

I miss my mom. I think that’s obvious. I don’t need to tell you how amazing my mom is. I’ve written about her numerous times. In fact, the posts I write about her are the most read posts on here. When I think about her, I mean really think about her, my stomach gets tied up in knots. I can’t help it, I get sad. At the end of every month, right around when the 29th hits, is when I get a bit sad. Even when I don’t know what day it is I still get that feeling of sadness. I guess my body clock just knows. Last week it was 3 months since my mom has been gone.

Because I work in the stationery industry I’ve been thinking about Mother’s Day since January. I’ve been thinking about designing those cards since the holidays. When my mom’s health took a turn for the worse I knew I would feel a certain kind of way when May 8th, 2016 would roll around. It all started last week at Unique LA. My mom loved events like Unique LA and the farmer’s market. Whenever special events like those happened she would always, always volunteer to help us sell if she was able. I remember when she was doing radiation to treat her breast cancer, she would come straight to the farmer’s market right after her radiation appointment just so she can pass out samples, sell pastries, and hang out with me. When last week’s Unique LA came I couldn’t help but think about her. She was a people person, she just loved to talk to people.

My mom and Charlie selling pastries at Unique LA
My mom and Charlie selling pastries at Unique LA

I was obviously selling Mother’s Day cards and all the ones inspired by her were very popular with the crowd. Ninong’s and CO did well at Unique LA, my mom would have been extremely proud. 🙂

As Sunday approaches the knots in my stomach continue to grow tighter. Thinking about past Mother’s Days with her, reminiscing about all the presents I got her or made for her, thinking about the remaining Mother’s Days that I will experience without her…it’s just a mixture of happiness and sadness. That’s what inspired my Miss you Most card.

miss_you_most

Sigh..I miss you. Happy Mother’s Day, Mommy. It doesn’t really matter if you’re alive or not because I will always honor and think of you on days like this. Especially on days like this.

xoxo,

Kissa

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